Monday Musings

No Problem

How do you respond when someone says "Thank you?"  If you're like me, you do what your parents raised you to do and say "You're welcome."  When you think about it, it's the ultimate courtesy to tell someone they are welcome to receive whatever you gave or did for him or her.  It's also positive and upbeat.

Try it today...say "thank you" to someone, especially if he or she is under 30.  More often than not, the response you will get is "No problem."  This is very different; the other person is not saying that you are welcome to anything, but rather, it wasn't a problem to do it for you.

When did daily courtesy become an extension of "Goodfellas?"  When did we become so self-centered that doing something for somebody could be considered such a problem that you have to assure that person it was not?  Have we become such a negative society?

Back-Up Plan

Lately, whenever I start to back out of a parking spot, someone inevitably walks right behind my car.  Don't they realize they can get hurt or dead?  Do they expect me to be able to see around the SUVs parked on either side of my car, so that I know they're about to walk behind me?  Even the back-up camera in Joni's car doesn't have 180-degree vision...it can only see what is right behind the car.

Maybe it's God's way of thinning the herd.  If so, I don't want to be the one responsible for knocking off Grandma or little Mia.  So, I've started to back into parking spots; then I can leave by driving forward.

Putrid Pizza

Every year, there are lists of the best pizza places, and most people know where they are, to the point that it was big news when Frank Pepe's decided to open a place in Chestnut Hill, MA.  So my question is...if everyone knows what good pizza is supposed to taste like, why are there so many awful pizza joints?

Do they think we don't notice that the crust is doughy or the sauce is watery or the cheese smells like moldy socks?  We do, and we don't like it.  So if you're going to open and run a pizza restaurant, take some extra time getting to know the components of good pizza and make it like that.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING TO YOU ALL!

Change Our Primary System

In 1986, Paul Simon released his landmark album, "Graceland," which opened with "The Boy in the Bubble," that featured the line, "These are the days of miracle and wonder."  It's been almost 30 years since then, and a lot has happened in the interim, but if Simon released that album today, he'd likely have to change the line to, "These are the days of misery and anger."

Everywhere you look, people are miserable, angry, and hateful.  Radical Islamists would rather kill people than negotiate with them, the world's climate is in grave danger while people around the globe ignore the warnings, and you can't go to school or the movies without worrying that the guy next to you may pull out a gun and open fire at any minute.

And how do we deal with it?  By encouraging people like Donald Trump, who feed off that anger and appeal to our basest instincts.

It used to be that this type of political climate could not exist in periods of economic prosperity, but something has gone wrong.  The numbers say that the economy is great, but most of us feel poorer than ever; it's not trickling down.

This situation enables radicals around the globe to expand their influence.  Even here in the US, we see that John Boehner is not conservative enough for the Tea Party.  As far as I'm concerned, the relatively strong economy is the only thing preventing the Tea Party from morphing into neo-fascism.  If that economy were to tank (as it could, given the unsteadiness of the world's financial markets), the anger aimed at immigrants and young Black men could easily morph into placing them in concentration camps.

People tell me, "Oh, that can't happen here...not in this modern era."  But that's exactly what Jews in pre-Nazi Germany said.

And don't think the Democrats are free from anger.  Have you seen Bernie Sanders?  His message may be on target, but he looks like he's ready to explode at any minute.  I'm not sure I want his finger on the button any more than I want Trump's.

The truth is that no sane person who's had a life would want to run for office in this era of hate, which features internet searches into everything that anyone has ever said or done.  Several congressmen have recently admitted that we are spending millions of dollars examining the Benghazi incident for the sole purpose of bringing down Hillary.  That money could be spent on promoting public service.

But the Republicans hate Hillary, and the Democrats hate the Republicans, and there you have it.  Even in this country, which prides itself on democracy and diversity, no one can compromise.  So, why are we surprised when everyone else hates us?

I wish I had an answer to the world's issues, other than to sound like a beauty contestant asking for "world peace."  But I do have an idea that might temper the rhetoric right here in the US: Change our primary election system.

Let's face it...only about 15% of voters cast ballots in primaries for any office, and those people tend to be the zealots on either end of the political spectrum.  So, what we end up with are nominees that don't represent the mainstream; you often have to choose between an ultra-liberal Democrat and an ultra-conservative Republican.  In addition, we allow people to register as independents, then vote in whichever primary they choose...those are the people that often take the parties in directions they might not otherwise go.

Here's an idea for changing the system:

1. If a voter has a party preference, he or she will register in that party, and have to retain that affiliation for a minimum of ten years.  This prevents people from switching to sabotage the other party.
2. Independents cannot vote in either party's primary elections.  This prevents the radical elements from exerting undue influence.
3. If someone who has registered with a party fails to vote in three, consecutive primaries (for any federal offices--president, senator, congressperson), that voter loses his or her party affiliation and becomes an independent.  This encourages people, who feel strongly about supporting their party's philosophy, to vote in primaries.
4. These are federal regulations that cannot be altered by any state, but do not pertain to local or statewide elections.  This prevents the above provisions from infringing on states' rights.

If we were to implement these provisions, while simultaneously taking action to overturn the Citizens United decision, we may stand a chance of reducing the anger and hate that have recently dominated our political landscape.  In doing so, we could set an example for the rest of the world that may at least begin to turn down the volume on the hate meter.

Fake-Gate

If you watched the game between the Colts and the Patriots on Sunday Night Football, you were probably scratching your head when you saw the Colts, on fourth down with three yards to go, preparing to punt before shifting into a bizarre (illegal) formation that left two Colts players in the middle of the field, confronting five Patriots who were prepared to pounce on them.  The ball was hiked, and predictably, the man with the ball was tackled for a loss, giving the Patriots a chance to score from outstanding field position.

But now, the truth has come out.  The Patriots cheated. 

According to unnamed sources from within the Colts organization, Bill Belichick waited until Colts Head Coach Chuck Pagano put down his clipboard before sending a ball attendant over to the Colts sideline, where he inserted, into the papers on Pagano's clipboard, a sheet of paper with the fake punt diagrammed.  The next time the Colts' had to punt, Pagano called the play.

After all, it can't be that the Colts are inept or that whenever they play the Patriots, they find ways to self-destruct.  So, it has to be that the Patriots cheated.  We'll call it "Fake-Gate."

Head Coaching in the NFL

Joe Philbin was fired this week as head coach of the Miami Dolphins.  Joe Philbin should never have been a head coach...he is clueless.  In fact, since Bill Belichick took the helm of the Patriots, there have been 21 head coaches among the other three teams in the AFC East (Bills, Dolphins, and Jets).

I often watch football games with people who don't understand one key aspect of the NFL...the games are played by the head coaches, who decide how to use the players they have to implement the game plan.  In the 1960s, my favorite team was the Dallas Cowboys, for one reason...the head coach was Tom Landry.  For the last 15 years, I've had the privilege to root for a team with another great head coach...the Patriots and Bill Belichick.

You might say that the great coaches are successful because they have great players, but you would be wrong.  In the case of the consistently successful teams, the head coach makes the players great by designing and implementing a system and game plans that use their combined talents to achieve success.

The all-time greats include George Halas (Bears), Vince Lombardi (Packers), Tom Landry (Cowboys), Chuck Noll (Steelers), Bill Walsh (49ers), Bill Parcells (Giants), and Bill Belichick (Patriots).  There have been other, good, successful head coaches in the NFL, but these guys won consistently, with whatever talent they had available to them.

I recently attended a wedding in which a Philly fan was making a toast to a group of people from Massachusetts.  In her toast, she said, "Now I know why the Eagles lost the Super Bowl to the Patriots...Deflategate."  It made for a good laugh, but clearly she did not understand that Andy Reid had the win in hand before blowing it.  The Patriots simply executed their game plan and watched the Eagles fall apart.

There are four key aspects of great coaching: (1) building a professional, winning culture, (2) evaluating talent, (3) developing game plans, and (4) managing games.  Andy Reid is one of those coaches who is good at evaluating talent but terrible at game management.  You only have to look at this year's Kansas City Chiefs to understand that.

If you want another example, look no further than the Atlanta Falcons.  Under Mike Smith, they were a decent team that always seemed to implode, but under Dan Quinn, they are 4-0 so far and look as strong as any team in the NFL--with essentially the same talent.

If you look around the league today, there are a few other excellent head coaches like Mike McCarthy (Packers), Sean Payton (Saints), Tom Coughlin (Giants), and Pete Carroll (Seahawks).  There are a few who have potential, but it's too early to tell, including Todd Bowles (Jets), Ron Rivera (Panthers), Mike McCoy (Chargers), Bill O'Brien (Texans), and Mike Pettine (Browns).  There are also a slew of coaches who have been disappointing so far, including:

• Chip Kelly (Eagles).  Sorry friends and family in Philly, but until he starts to manage games like a professional coach instead of a college coach, he's no better than Andy Reid.
• Rex Ryan (Bills).  Strip away the bombast and the tough veneer, and all that's left is an average coach.
• Chuck Pagano (Colts).  He yelled about Deflategate, but Brady could throw rocks instead of footballs and still beat Pagano's predictable teams.
• John Harbaugh (Ravens).  He's another loudmouth whose every move is the same as the week before and the week after.
• Marvin Lewis (Bengals).  Generally clueless, he finally had the sense to put his offense into the hands of someone really smart (Hue Jackson), and the results are showing.
• Mike Tomlin (Steelers). His only Super Bowl win came from a team he inherited.  Now, he can't win a playoff game, even with a great offense, because he doesn't know how to adapt to game situations.

When it comes down to it, the best head coaches are playing chess while the others are playing checkers.  Do you really think that Belichick, McCarthy, or Carroll goes into a game without a unique game plan and a contingency for every move the other coach might make?  If you do, maybe you can be the next head coach of the Dolphins.

Vindicategate

On January 30, I posted on this blog an article in which I discussed what has been referred to as "Deflategate."  I concluded that article by saying, "If it is proven that the Patriots organization somehow willfully manipulated the psi of its footballs, I will be the first one to advocate for stiff penalties and suspensions, but I'm fairly confident that won't happen.  However, I'm also confident that as long as they keep winning, the press and most of the American public will continue to hate them.  Maybe that's the real scandal; you can call it Hategate."

I took a lot of crap for that article, but since that time:

• We've read the (ridiculous) Wells Report.
• We saw Robert Kraft accept penalties in the hopes of sparing Tom Brady.
• We watched in awe as Roger Goodell absurdly heard an appeal of his own decision.
• We've seen Tom Brady take the NFL to court to clear his name and get his 4-game suspension nullified.

About 40 minutes ago, Judge Berman, who heard Brady's case, issued a 40-page decision overturning the NFL's suspension of Tom Brady.  According to the New York Times (a few minutes ago):

• The 40-page decision picks apart the N.F.L.’s case, finding a number of faults and reflecting Berman’s skepticism in recent court hearings.
• Berman said Brady could not be suspended for “general awareness” of others’ conduct, as an N.F.L. investigative report determined.
• “Brady had no notice that such conduct was prohibited or any reasonable certainty of potential discipline stemming from such conduct,’’ the judge wrote.

The 40-page ruling was just made available, and in it, the judge called into question the validity of the Wells Report finding that "it is more probable than not that Brady was at least generally aware of the inappropriate activities of McNally and Jastremski involving the release of air from Patriots game balls."  With regard to that allegation, the judge wrote, "With respect to ‘general awareness’ of others' misconduct--which is the principal finding in both the Wells Report and the Vincent Letter--Brady had no notice that such conduct was prohibited, or any reasonable certainty of potential discipline stemming from such conduct. The Court concludes that, as a matter of law, no NFL policy or precedent notifies players that they may be disciplined (much less suspended) for general awareness of misconduct by others. And, it does not appear that the NFL has ever, prior to this case, sought to punish players for such an alleged violation.

Forgetting the legal aspects of the ruling, the fact is that the judge poked holes in the Wells Report, repeatedly citing misinformation and inconsistencies.  The truth remains that this whole story would never have gotten any traction if it hadn't been about the New England Patriots, of whom the other teams and fans are jealous, and it should not have marred the celebration of the team's fourth Super Bowl victory.

I hope that the story ends here, but I believe that Goodell will not let it rest, preferring to take down the best team, and one of the best players, in the league he purports to represent.  Whatever he does makes no matter to me as I bask in the vindication of my favorite football player.  I guess we should now call it Vindicategate.

The Best of Us

Joni and I recently lost two friends, each of whom we had known for many years and had been very important to us.  On the surface, they were very different: Dick Stroud was an African American artist, teacher, and Aikido master, while Betty Ann Miller was a Jewish philanthropist and spiritual leader.  But their similarities ran much deeper.

We met Dick Stroud in the mid-1990s when his son, Ben, joined our son’s class at the Charles River School.  I remember being immediately impressed by his intelligence, his genuine curiosity, and the calm demeanor with which he carried himself.  He taught me a great deal about striving for inner peace and seeing beauty in the smallest, seemingly insignificant things.  Dick passed away in June, and I will miss his humor, his generosity, and that warm, knowing smile with which he approached all things.

In 1997, when Gavin joined the Rashi Middle School, Betty Ann Miller was the first person to greet us and offer help in navigating this new experience.  Her commitment to Jewish education was palpable, and she seemingly always did the right thing, both big and small, for others.  Never wanting recognition nor accolades, she opened up her heart to us, as she had so often with so many others, and she persistently guided us by example.  She died yesterday, and I will miss her spirit, her generosity, and the twinkle in her eyes.

It’s interesting that Dick and Betty Ann were such big-hearted people, because it was their hearts that eventually gave way.  They strongly influenced my life and always conducted themselves with grace and dignity.  They were the best of us.

Whatever Happened to the "Do Not Call List?"

On June 27, 2003, the U.S. Federal Trade Commission (FTC) opened the National Do Not Call Registry in order to comply with the Do-Not-Call Implementation Act of 2003.  Within a short time, most of us had registered our phone numbers, and for a few years, it seemed to work.  I know that I received very few spam calls, and usually, if I threatened them with the "Do Not Call Registry," they hung up quickly and didn't call back.

All that seems to have changed to the point where I now get 5 to 10 calls per day from people trying to sell me something.  If I say I'm not interested or mention the list, they just call back another time.  I've tried sending the numbers to the Do Not Call Registry, but it doesn't seem to matter.

So what happened?  The best I can tell or garner from the internet is that the government just stopped enforcing the list, except for massively blatant offenders.

Why did this happen?  Well, it seems like the US and state governments just stopped funding the enforcement.  Maybe it happened during the recession of 2009-10, or maybe the companies that make the calls have been donating to the campaigns of enough congressmen to get them to cut the funding.  Whatever the case, I don't think I'm alone in receiving many more calls and/or being upset about this.  People are even getting junk calls on their mobile phones.

As usual, Congress will not act unless they hear from enough people.  So today, I'm going to shoot an email to my representatives in the US and state legislature asking them to push for the enforcement of the Do Not Call List.  You may want to do the same.